Whose Wedding Is It Anyway? 

Weddings are supposed to be about two people—the couple, their love, their commitment. Yet, the moment you invite even one other person, the dynamic shifts. Suddenly, it's no longer just your wedding. It becomes a shared experience, shaped by expectations, opinions, and compromises.

For couples who truly want a wedding that is theirs—pure, intentional, and free from external influences—there’s a powerful case for an intimate elopement or an ultra-small ceremony. Here’s why:

1. No One Else’s Opinions Matter

The second you invite a guest, you invite their expectations.

• "You should wear this."
• "You have to do a first dance!"
• "Are you sure you don’t want a bigger cake?"

Even well-meaning loved ones can’t help but impose their preferences. But a truly private wedding means you get to celebrate exactly how you want, without a chorus of outside voices.

2. Freedom to Be Completely Present

With guests in attendance, even a small group, there’s an underlying pressure to entertain, acknowledge, and engage with them. Instead of being fully immersed in your vows, you’re subtly aware of how people are reacting. A wedding for two allows you to savor every moment without distraction.

3. No Need for Approval or Permission

When it’s just the two of you, there’s no need to ask:

• Will this venue work for everyone?
• Will our families be offended if we don’t invite them?
• Will Aunt Susan’s dietary restrictions complicate the dinner menu?

Every decision is purely about what you want, not what will make others comfortable.

4. A Wedding Without Performance

Even the smallest wedding with guests can feel like a performance. You’re "on stage" in front of an audience, even if that audience is just five people. A private ceremony removes the pressure to "do" or "say" anything for the sake of tradition or expectation. It’s raw, real, and unscripted.

5. Your Love Story, Your Rules

Forget worrying about table arrangements, speeches, or whether everyone is having a good time. A wedding that’s just about you two is about the essence of your relationship. Whether you say “I do” barefoot on the beach, in a secluded forest, or at city hall—it’s yours, and yours alone.

The Takeaway

The moment someone else is present, even just one person, your wedding is no longer entirely yours. That’s not necessarily a bad thing—some couples love sharing their day with family and friends. But if you want a wedding that is purely about your relationship, then keep it intimate. Keep it small. Or better yet, keep it just the two of you.

After all, marriage is between two people—so why shouldn’t the wedding be, too?